Username: svladimirova90 Date: 23-05-2024 18:10:33 Mood: full of life Music:

Feel like I'm loosing my mind lately. Never really watched porn until recently, almost never masturbated, but the last couple of months are insane - I'm rubbing myself for 5+ hours every day, looking at pictures of big cocks and fantasizing about being taken by black men and boys. Started to insult and humiliate random guys that message me on dating apps, straight up telling them how pathetic they are and they have no chance to be with me. Being QoS is so empowering, I feel drunk and light-headed all the time

Username: svladimirova90 Date: 24-05-2024 14:09:09 Mood: disappointed Music:

Yesterday I decided to be more open about being into interracial, to talk about it online, to chat with people, to make connections. Today I randomly see a woman (younger than me, maybe in her mid-20s) pushing a stroller with two black babies. Thinking "why her and not me" I almost approached her, but decided against it, not knowing what to say and feeling bad that I kind of want to talk to her just for a chance to meet her lover. In 30+ years I've seen maybe five interracial couples in real life and didn't care but now I have this new fantasy and I'm instantly being reminded that someone is living out that fantasy.
After shower, in bed with my laptop, touching myself while reading forum, checking out profiles and writing this. Have two dating websites open in another tabs, answering something like "ew" to every white man who messages me. I can't even explain why it makes me feel better.